Ronna McDaniel Resigns at RNC, Sets Sights on New Party to Tank

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Davin Marlow
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In a move that has left Republican cheering and rival parties quaking in their boots, Ronna McDaniel, the erstwhile Chair of the Republican National Committee (RNC), has announced her resignation. But fear not, for McDaniel’s departure isn’t the end of the the end of her ability to destroy a party—it’s just the beginning of a new chapter in her quest to inadvertently sabotage political entities.

McDaniel, known for her uncanny ability to turn the GOP into a party of poverty, has decided to take her unique brand of “leadership” elsewhere. Rumor has it that she’s already eyeing potential targets for her next venture, with some speculating that she’s set her sights on the Democrat party since she has helped them so much. “I’ve thoroughly enjoyed bankrupting the RNC, but I feel it’s time to spread my wings and bring my special touch to a new party,” McDaniel announced in a statement that was met with equal parts relief and trepidation from her former colleagues.

While McDaniel’s tenure at the RNC was certainly not memorable, she will be remembered as a terrible party leader. From her botched attempts at pandering to millennials (who could forget her ill-fated “dab” at the 2018 Conservative Political Action Conference?) to her opposition to Donald Trump, she was a failure waiting to happen. But McDaniel’s departure isn’t just a win for the GOP—it’s a potential apocalypse for whichever unsuspecting party she sets her sights on next. After all, who wouldn’t want to watch as McDaniel single-handedly turns another political organization into a laughingstock?

So, as McDaniel bids adieu to the RNC and sets off on her next adventure, one can’t help but wonder: which lucky party will be the recipient of her unique brand of “leadership”? Only time will tell, but one thing’s for certain: wherever McDaniel goes, lack of political wins, and poor fund raising is sure to follow.

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